verse of my day

Ephesians 4:1 Live a life worthy of the calling you have received. This means tome that I am a child of God that the fruit I put out should reflect God. I must remind myself that sometimes the only Jesus people see is the one in me! Blessings, Sarah

second chances

God is such an amazing God! He gives second chances at the most perfect time!

Psalm 25:7 Do not remember the rebelious sins of my youth. Remember mein the light ofyour unfailinglove. For you are merciful o lord! Jeremiah 17: 14 Heal me, olord and I will be healed. Save me and I will be saved. For You are the one I praise. Lament. 3:22 and 23 For His compassions never fail. They are new every morning, great is your faithfulness.

new things

I know that it has been a long time since I have written but a lot has happened. I no longer work for the wiccan lady! YEA!! God gave me an amazing job with the weekends off I have gone past my year ann. for my rape and it is actually been a year and a half and God is a mighty healer! My sabbatical is over and God taught me wonderful things about myself and Him! After a lot of prayer I decided not to renew it. God wants for me to see His love for me through another person's eye. God has not brought me that person yet but He has the right person in the right time. Until then Godis my mate. I had surgery in october. I had my gall bladder takenout and in feband march I had a cancer scare. I went to the doctorand after tests it was not cancer! Praise God! I was scared. With every thing that happened my faith has been deepen! sarah

Crazy week

This week has been so crazy!! God has shown me different things this week and I have battled this week. My work company cut it's hours across the company to where full timers are getting 32 hours a week so I am trying to make due and I am also looking for another part time or a full time job. God always provides.Tuesday are a BIG day for us because Tuesday is when all the new things come out and you learn the ropes of who is important authors and singers and stuff. Well since hours are cut everyone is stressing because there is too much stuff to do and not enough workers. So, the managers are stressing and coming down on others that this needs to be done by a deadline but when you are slammed it is hard. It has been a stressful week.The wiccan kept screaming at me the past couple of days. To scream at me infront of others is very non professional.This weekend from thursday on was bad. Thursday was my hardest day. Not only was it a day for medical tests but it was also 7 month anniversary since I was raped. I was raped 3 days before thanksgiving by a friend that I went on a date with. I was date raped. I think because it is getting closer to the year anniversary I am having more problems with it. This is my second rape. I always dreamt of giving my virginity away to my hubby but it was taken from me. I never gave it away. I am really having to fight emotionally because I feel not worthy. I feel like a man will not want me because I am damaged and used. I took a sebatical away from men this year because I feel like I am just wanting time with God. God has already picked my mate and will give me him when we are both ready. Nothing I go through will lose my mate. I may have to wait longer but I won't lose him. God already knows him and just as he is continually preparing me God is continually preparing him. I know that there are battles that he is overcoming as well. This week has been an emotional fight. I am fighting over the emotions of my rape, emotions of not being lseeing myself the way I should, overcoming emotions of hurtful words and actions, emotions of wanting to restart my anorexia. But my fight is because I am letting my emotions rule instead of God rule. When I finally gave everything up to God and said God I have no strength left, your strength will have to be my guide everything got better and god started putting people there to minister to me and then God in His spirit alone is letting me minister to them. Here I am like "God I am the person they should be going to least." God says"You are beautiful in my sight." The lesson this week is to continue to see myyself through God's eyes and not my own.

God in the midst of storms

There is a worship song that I sing in my quiet times. It is real simple and the lyrics are true if ya think on it. The lyrics are:

I could run away but you would never leave
You would always stay right by my side.
Right by my side my Lord,
Right by my side.

How many times do we forget that God is right beside us?

Today I had a medical nuclear test done which means I had radioactive fluid put in my veins by an IV and had this big huge camera sit on top of me taking pictures of my gall bladder and liver since I was having pain in my right abdomin area. The doctors can not figure out what is going on. While the technician was doing the procedure I started having some problems. I started getting really warm with the fluid and then my heart started racing. I told God that he was God and that He was mighty enough to calm me down and let me relax.I told God that his strength would have to pull me through and God did. I finished the test and will get my results next week. I do not know what will be my results but I know that God is there right beside me. Plus, this week has been hard for me with work. I manage the children's department for Borders Bookstore and for starters my boss is a wiccan so we clash a lot being that I am a god loving christian. She constantly yells and creates stress and this week has been very hard. There is a lot of projects this week that must be done and God is getting every single one done-it is amazing!! God could not do that untill I turned it over to him. There are so many things that we can't do on our own-we have to say God I can't do it, you have to do it. When we do the reward is so awesome!! What I thought were storms were actually God's blessings because I got to know him better. With knowing him better my faith in him increases. So if you are reading this and are going through a storm know that God is right beside you even when you want to run away just whispering come back, come back to me.